How Can I Lessen The Stress And Save My Marriage This Xmas Season?

By M B Laloli

It is the season to be jolly but for some of you Xmas is not a time of joyfulness but a time of discontent and tension. It is a common knowledge that some marriages end up in strife over the Xmas festive season. The extra burdens associated with the Xmas frivolities can really put stress on a relationship. Family tension, financial overspending, dissatisfied children, a disappointed wife, and scraps with the in-laws. The Xmas season you once looked so forward to becomes a time bomb with its timer set, ticking away until suddenly it goes off and you find yourself in a divorce court. Don’t let Xmas destroy your marriage – take action now to save your marriage

The reason for this is that some relationships do not stand the test of time and gradually loose their vitality and become routine, boring, irritating and consequently unsatisfying. Pleasures which once gave so much joy such as Xmas celebrations have lost their excitement and have become dull and boring. Minor flaws turn into major faults; little molehills become giant mountains; little annoying habits suddenly become very irritating to the other partner; fights and bickering instead of kisses and cuddles.

At Xmas these feelings are all personified. It is the year end and you are overtired and ready for a holiday. This fatigue is amplified by the constant attendance at year end functions and Xmas parties with the excesses of food and alcohol. As well there is the extra strain of Xmas shopping and dealing with the crowds and the traffic.

To overcome this trend you need to think of your partner and surprise them with new delights every so often. This is particularly important to relieve the stress of the Xmas period. Put into action more of the simpler things in life which will satisfy your partner, such as walks along the beach, back rubs, special cuddles, tender touches, stolen kisses, give compliments, give flowers, decorate the Xmas tree together, and do small unexpected jobs to help out.

These things are easy, inexpensive but have a quick, mind-blowing effect on your partner in that it builds collaboration, confidence and goodwill. And this lays the foundation for future growth. These selfless acts increase the desirable behaviour yearned for by your partner.

It is also essential to eliminate undesirable behaviours which irritate your partner, for example, hang your clothes up, don’t leave them on the floor; put away the milk , don’t leave it on the bench; choose a programme and watch it with your partner, don’t surf the TV channels; don’t allow too much alcohol to affect your behaviour, and don’t spend beyond your household budget at Xmas or at any other time. Ensure that there are no shocks and causes for concern and squabbling by planning Xmas and the Xmas budget well in advance.

“The Twelve Days of Christmas” carol says it all about giving to your loved one – “on the 12 days of Xmas my true love gave to me……..”. An article written by Crissa Shoemaker DeBree posted on December 12, 2012, claims that if you were to buy your loved one all of the gifts listed in this carol it would cost you $25,431.18.

I am sure your love does not expect you to spend this amount. You really don’t have to spend much money to make your partner happy. Actually you could adapt the carol to your own needs and actions to make it a very special Xmas for your partner. As an example you could adopt this one or do your own.

*On the 1st day of Xmas my true love gave to me a big kiss under the Xmas tree * On the 2nd day of Xmas my true love gave to me 2 loving cuddles *On the 3rd day of Xmas my true love gave to me 3 cherished words *On the 4th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 4 giant hugs *On the 5th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 5 red roses *On the 6th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 6 nights of loving *On the 7th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 7 romantic dinners *On the 8th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 8 hours of petting *On the 9th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 9 yummy chocolates *On the 10th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 10 days of cruising *On the 11th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 11 hours of helping *On the 12th day of Xmas my true love gave to me 12 small gifts in wrapping

See how easy Xmas could be !!! Don’t let Xmas destroy your marriage – take action to save your marriage by adopting and practising some of these small gestures which will bring so much pleasure and joy. And why just do it at Xmas. Live the magic Xmas spirit every day of the year.

We all want  to be happy at Xmas don’t we? Some of the simple but thoughtful actions we take can help us to avoid the stresses and strains on a marriage during this time. But if your relationship is in trouble and you REALLY want to save your marriage  you can find some more strategies to help you today. Click on the link

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